SUNDAY 10th DAY 3 WASHINGTON D.C. Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?

Today was a tourist day. Sometimes you have to bite the bullet and join the masses if you want to see the sights and sounds of whatever place you are visiting. And Washington is a big place with all the historic stuff well spread out. We started by agreeing to purchase two days worth of 'hop on hop off' tickets for The Washington Trolley. This quaint vehicle serves all the tourist areas and with the driver providing live commentary is not only informative but entertaining. We started by taking The Green Line which takes you to the North if the capital, or should I say Capitol. The highlight of the route, over an hour and a half in length, was the area of the city called Georgetown . This is one of the original settlements named after the King of England at the time of founding, George II. Many Presidents had sumner houses up here and needless to say property is exceptionally beautiful and exceptionally expensive. But they ain't so bright up there folks and they ran the gauntlet of annoying my wife by denying her alcohol at well past alcohol o'clock.

Feeling in need of refreshment we happened upon a 'bar and grill'. We, as veggies are not necessarily interested in the 'grill' element of this but hold on reader, we have Merlin with us, who loves the idea of total immersion in American 'culture' which includes experiencing their heart attack jobs, namely burgers with at least six inches between  the top and bottom of the burger bun once filling is applied. And that was what he got! But what we got, Trish and me, was a shock! As it was well after the aforementioned alcohol o'clock, Trish decided that a Bloody Mary was the order of the day. Our waitress, as accommodating as ever in this tipping paradise, took our order but then asked Trish for ID. Now, avid readers, this was a hot day 30+. We were pretty frazzled and in need of refreshment. This waitress was walking a suddenly taut tightrope. Did we have ID? No. Was Trish getting her Bloody Mary? No. Was my wife upset? Astonishingly at first No. Unlike her husband who pleaded her case, siting a daughter of 26 and an age of 47, she dutifully ordered a coke without rum or any other alcoholic enhancement. What a Woman! Secretly, I think she was revelling in the fact that she didn't look old enough to drink, here in the U.S of A. You know how women are. Me, a man would be just pissed off. But, I don't think that's ever likely to happen. Not now and not ever.

There followed a tour of the local shops during which Merlin picked up a copy of 'The Marijuana Cookbook, supposedly for son Ossie but.......... And then we were back on the 'Trolley' with 'Slim Dave' or whoever he was for the rest of the ride down to THE CAPITOL.

Of course the next stop was a visit to The White House. Although 'visit' is a loose term. There is obviously no chance of a visit and there is also almost no chance of a decent view, for it is now surrounded by trees and secret service police. The face of the building must now be viewed from afar, with ancient access points now terminated by cops on very fast and chrome heavy Harley- Davidson Motorbikes. Every now and then one of them would go roaring off into the distance in a show of subliminal power, all clad in leather and haha, sweating profusely in this thirty degree humidity. Many of the cops merely have the job of keeping people off the grass, for clearly in the old days the public were allowed to wander at will around the adjacent roads and avenues, including the surrounding green space. Not so now. A mere two step encroachment into an undesired area brings either a whistle or blast on a motorcycle siren. And you don't really want to ignore those warning signals, as you get the impression that all an sundry are poised on hair triggers, waiting for action, that thankfully never comes.......except......well except for the story of some daring nutter who, in a silver Honda, managed, somehow, to join in at the back of the Presidential motorcade as it roared down Pennsylvania Avenue and swept through the massive security gates in front of the White House.  He was only discovered when the cars pulled up to allow the President to get out! What happened next was not part of the story told to us on one of our 'Trolley Tours'. At least he didn't tread on the grass!